Regular readers will know that I have struggled with heath issues, operations and loosing weight and over the last 3 years it would be fair to say I had fallen out of love with myself.
My confidence has never soared but quite honestly over the last year it’s been on the floor. Looking back at me from my mirror was a tired, haggard looking women that I no longer recognised.
I have always thrived on being busy and being needed.
But I have realised that I need more than that in my life. I need to enjoy being in my own skin and I haven’t felt that way for a long time.
I know I have 5-6 stones loose but I think my inability to stick at a healthier way of life has been that I don’t like me anymore. I need to like me as I am not the women I was 10 years ago, not the teen, not as a wife, or even a mum. In fact I am not sure who I am anymore.
I don’t think this is unusual, in fact I think it’s quite normal that people in general fall out of love with themselves as they change over the years but I know I have hidden behind being busy and looking after my family.
Over the last few weeks I have taken on board that I need to make time for me, emotional, mentally and physically so I have started making small changes to take back even 20 minutes each day just for me.
Taking a long soak in the tub while watching a film on my iPad or an early night (before 9pm) and reading or watching something I am binge watching on Netflix.
This week I have also started heading to the gym for 30-60 minutes sessions too. However this time I am not trying to stress myself out fitting them in but heading to the gym as soon as Ollie comes home and using the wasted space before tea to squeeze in some cardio.
I am not going to lie the first session back after a little run I wanted to throw up. However it soon passed and I have felt so much better all round.
I am only just beginning to understand that how much self care can help but I now know that becoming the best me involves actually liking me first and this week was the first step.