Right about now I am feeling a failure………. failure as after a whole 2 years dieting and loosing an amazing 4.5 stones I seem to of back tracked and now my trousers wont fit, my confidence is on the floor.
I have tried, I promise I have tried but its just not happening. I have had melt downs before on the weight loss journey but this is by far the mother of them all.
I don’t want to be stick thin, I don’t expect super model looks or size 6 clothes but I have worked hard, and I have let myself down.
I gave up smoking in October using a Boots Smoke Free Advisor and by goodness it was hard, I struggled and became evil in those first few weeks, but I persevered and it paid off, I am now a non smoker but my trade off for that is the 1 1/2 stone that has decided to unceremoniously attach itself to my body ….
OK I know I cant blame the non smoking it was me that shovelled in that food like there was no tomorrow, it was me that ate the leftovers just because they were there.
Part of me is feeling elated that I kicked the habit, lets face it the health benefits of giving up smoking are amazing but the stone and half I now have to shift along with the remaining stubborn weight I had yet to shift really does feel like an amazingly high hill to climb and one that mentally I am not sure I can get over.
However right about now I am feeling pretty damn low at the journey I now face to loose it all again ..
I expected to put on a little bit of weight but I really have been shocked at just how much, although they do tell you that your eating habits may become effected giving up smoking and that it does effect your metabolism …… I was seriously in denial that this was the answer?!
Will 2014 be the year I remain smoke free and healthy?