Why Shouty Mummy Just Doesn’t Work For My Toddler

It makes me immensely proud that my kids are self aware, proactive, eager and even head strong. Although on the whole this is great for raising strong individuals but it can mean its harder work, especially when one of those children is a toddler. 

I knew the moment my youngest son looked at me for the first time that he had been here before. He is the cutest little button but the most stubborn of all my children. 

A lacking sleep and a fiercely determined attitude has led us both to become shouty parents. Something we both hate but slipped into almost by accident. 

It started with the shouting at the climbing, Jacob climbs … everything. tables, chairs, worktops and even the mantlepiece. One minute you look at the TV to turn over to Fireman Sam the next he is grinning at you from the top of the sideboard like he has achieved some great feat. Which of course to a 2 year old he has but for a parent with a fearless child it has become normal to scream ‘get down’ followed by further commands and subsequent removal from the furniture. 

While recovering from the shock of finding the little darling practically doing the hokey cokey from the top of the IKEA Kallax shelving cubing when you turn to get a fresh nappy, shouting has become the norm. I find him scaling the reclining chair as if it was an Olympic sport ready for the nose dive off the back…. And the shouts only get louder as the patience depletes. 

By tea time we are frazzled. We go from utter hilarity to total shock as he scales furniture and then does a little dance to gage how much trouble he is in.

It’s exhausting and fun and exhausting and even more fun but most of all I know that shouting doesn’t work and we need to become proactive at keeping him busy instead so there is no shock shouting.

Jacob is naturally a curious kid and his helpful side is almost as big as his climber side so I have found the key to keeping him on the ground and thats by giving him some jobs. While getting the nappy I then give it to Jacob and ask him to help and take it to the mat. When he is in that cheeky climbing mood I ask him to put things away, help load the washer or something similar. He is eager to please and if I am honest I enjoy his help. 

By tackling his behaviour in a whole new way and focussing on his need to please we are finding home life is far less stressful and a million times less shouty. Don’t get me wrong we still have moments we shock shout, normally when he is doing something dangerous like approaching the oven too quickly or standing with his fingers in the door jam but on the whole he is finally getting our attention in a positive way and the naughty climbing seems to be a lesser occurrence.