Since finding out about being pregnant it never really registered in my head that I would face another operation.
I had my last caesarean section in 2011, I had abdominal surgery in 2014 for abdominal adhesions and last March I underwent surgery again to have my gall bladder removed which was only months before falling pregnant this time.
I have known from the beginning that I would be having surgery, after an emergency section in 2001, elective section in 2011 there really would be no doubt that my days of even contemplating a natural birth were well and truly out the window and I would have Caesarean section.
However its only been the last couple of weeks it has finally hit home that I am going to be back in that theatre again and I am terrified.
The birth aspect of the surgery doesn’t phase me as after all I get a beautiful baby out of it, however for someone who hates relying on others and is super self-sufficient to the point of OCD with it … I am now getting panic attacks about how much this surgery really does impact on your ability to carry out the most basic tasks.
I am also going to be honest and say that my pain threshold is utter pants and I am a massive wimp.
In my last section I cried at having the cannula put into the back of my hand for goodness sake!
As much as the delivery of Joshua was the most amazing experience and one I hope will be recreated with the birth of this baby I am still utterly terrified.
I am trying to remain positive that I won’t be given the Oramorph that I was allergic to this time and so I won’t end up spending half a day in recovery projectile vomiting like something from the exorcist … but even trying to tell myself that it won’t be like that again I am still hitting panic mode and I am really not sure how to keep calm about it.
There is obviously no options and I know the only way now is to have surgery but I am so not mentally ready for the surgery even if I am ready to meet my other son!
*breathes deeply*
Well, there is no going back … in less than a week surgery is imminent and life will change again.
Oh my god, I feel so much for you, whilst pregnant my pelvis broke and since then every 5 years or so it goes again and have to learn to walk, I jumped at a plane but wouldn’t do it again, I wish you well, and during my labour I projectile vomited and think you are brave to share. I hope to hear your good news soon x
aww Anitia, i am sending you the biggest hugs in the world! what a complete nightmare you most go through with your pelvis!
Oh gosh i did projectile vomit with my last but that was the allergic reaction to the meds … so hoping its not the case this time!
Oh hunny.
I feel for you. Yes it’s scary but so very worth it.
Now they know you are allergic to oramorph they will give you something else and you can have anti sickness meds if you are ill in recovery, I had to with Harry.
Can wait to see bubs.
Clare i am in complete meltdown tonight over it all .. i so want to look at his little face but that pain and agony that comes with surgery is evil!
Oh sweetie, please don’t worry. It will all be fine and you will be up and about soon enough. Just don’t over do it! Or go for the bean casserole when you are I hospital. That was my biggest mistake with little man. Got home and had family visit and I couldn’t even see them! All the best xx
see last time i was doing everything i did before the op and i made it worse so this time i have pre warned Ollie its him doing it all for a while … I have booked my space on the sofa for the foreseeable lol
Try not to worry! Sending you the biggest of hugs! It will all be worth it x
aww thanks Kim xx
I cried having the cannula and the spinal. You are not a wuss at all. It hurts. I even had to get a student nurse to come in the shower with me and take th dressing off because I couldn’t do it myself.
You will be fine. Take all the drugs. Don’t do too much and take more drugs.
When I was in there,mother said do you want pain relief? I said yes without thinking about it. The midwife said are you in pain? I said no but someone told me to never refuse pain relief haha.
I told you it’s not out me off. All pregnant women go through this. Them babies need to come out somewhere my love. It will be over before you know it xx
aww thanks lovely, i think your totally right …. drugs …. drugs … drugs and I am hoping that i am pain free this time… gosh its the standing up for the first time .. it feels like your insides are going to hit the floor!
That was meant to say midwife not mother
I hope it all goes better than you anticipate. I got them to put numbing gel on my hand prior to being cannulated – I am that much of a wimp!
i think i am going to ask them on Thursday in pre op if i can have that too! .. genius idea!